Sunday, March 23, 2008

How to Make a Time Machine.

  • Connect toaster to TV through a series of 5 megavolt capacitors.
  • The AV cable should have a Frank Turbulator attached between a BOF Filament bulb with a laboratory rat inside. (the lab rat should be white, otherwise the Bio-Organic Filtration filament wont work with any other color)
  • Turn on the stove and set it on Medium, Put a sauce pan on the stove and heat a layer of olive oil and fry some sausages while you wait for the BOF Filament bulb to emit a spectrum of light.
  • Once the BOF Filament emits the spectrum, quickly release the hamsters so that they would start running the 250 play wheels. (note: For every 5 hamster 3 will run the wheel) Wheel should be connected to the Toaster so that it runs on Hamster power. (note: Hamster power is more precise than voltage system)
  • Open the fridge and pour a glass of milk and consume it. (cookies are an option)
  • Once the toaster is hot and ready put a piece of bread and wait for it to toast (on heat medium, you may listen to a song while you wait)
  • When the toast is done (a ding sound you will hear) the time machine is ready. Just eat the toast and turn on the TV and flip channels till your desired destination shows up and just walk through the screen :D
P.S. This is a one way travel option. Most of the required materials are either made up or haven't been invented yet. And if you really want to to travel time buy a clock and carry it around with you on long journeys.